[meteorite-list] OT: Some humor for your holidays

[Michael Gilmer]

Happy Festivus!

Feats of strength - lifting a heavy iron meteorite from the hole you just dug.

Airing of grievances - any given day on this list. ;)

Festivus miracle - a North American witnessed lunar fall.

BTW, today is December 23rd, Festivus!

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Mike Gilmer - Galactic Stone & Ironworks Meteorites

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On 12/23/10, Greg Hupe <gmhupe at htn.net> wrote:
> I like that one, Rob.
>
> Santa does get lucky, he doesn't have to go through the TSA line and get one
> of the two choices; The Santa pat-down or scan-through...
>
> And as Rob and others have cheered, "Happy
> Christmas/Festivus/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Winter Solstice to All!"... and all
> other Merry/Happy greetings around the world and beyond!!
>
> Best regards,
> Greg
>
> ====================
> Greg Hupe
> The Hupe Collection
> NaturesVault (eBay)
> gmhupe at htn.net
> www.LunarRock.com
> IMCA 3163
> ====================
> Click here for my current eBay auctions:
> http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZnaturesvault
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Rob Matson" <mojave_meteorites at cox.net>
> To: <meteorite-list at meteoritecentral.com>
> Sent: Thursday, December 23, 2010 8:37 PM
> Subject: [meteorite-list] OT: Some humor for your holidays
>
>
>> Hi All,
>>
>> At the slight risking of offending any Scrooges w/o a sense of humor,
>> I forward the following Christmas observation.
>>
>> Happy Christmas/Festivus/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Winter Solstice to All!
>>
>> May Santa put a nice lump of coal (a CI/CO/CK/CM/etc. qualifies!)
>> in your stocking...
>>
>> --Rob
>>
>> - - - - - -
>>
>> The Illegal Immigrant Amongst Us
>> --------------------------------
>>
>> Every December 24, the illegal immigrant known as Santa Claus crosses
>> the border without a passport, carrying concealed packages, which he
>> presumably sneaks into the U.S. in order to avoid tariffs and inspection
>> by Customs. What's really in that huge sack? Homeland Security has never
>> asked and habitually turns a blind eye to this invasion!
>>
>> Look at how this international fugitive gets around: Santa Claus flies
>> in a custom-built sleigh that hasn't been inspected by the FCC nor
>> cleared by Air Traffic Control. He flies beneath radar and never files a
>> flight plan. He has no pilot's license, and he flies in the dark of
>> night with just one tiny bioluminescent red light to guide him - a clear
>> violation of safety regulations!
>>
>> Imagine those pulling Santa's heavy sleigh: Eight tiny reindeer, a
>> protected species being put to hard labor. None of these reindeer have
>> their required inoculations, and Santa's never gotten these
>> genetically-engineered animals registered and licensed. He keeps them
>> penned outside his workplace in below-freezing temperatures, in a clear
>> violation of animal protection laws. Where is the ASPCA while all this
>> is going on?
>>
>> And the conniving, crooked Claus harms more than just animals; he's
>> hurting hard-working people, too. "Santa's Workshop" is a clever
>> cover-up for a sweatshop, where non-union employees make less than
>> minimum wage and apparently get no overtime holiday pay. Add the fact
>> that no one has ever been allowed to inspect the place, and it's obvious
>> that you have a Third-World elf-exploitation operation.
>>
>> In addition, he maintains a data base of personally-identifying
>> information about our children! Names, addresses, ages, photos,
>> behavioral tendencies. Incredibly, parents appear to be complicit in
>> perpetuating this cultural phenomenon; Child Protection Services has yet
>> to be informed of these offenses.
>>
>> The bottom line is that Santa has been allowed to maintain a monopoly
>> over a massive toy distribution industry; he's cornered the Christmas
>> Eve gift market. Santa dares to give away his products for free in a
>> sinister attempt to crush all competition - just like Microsoft's
>> Internet Explorer. There has been no Antitrust Lawsuit, yet it's clear
>> that Santa Claus is the "Bill Gates of Christmas."
>>
>> However, it might be tough sledding for Jolly St. Nick this Christmas,
>> if someone points out this oversight to our legislators. After all,
>> Santa Claus is honest, reliable, and gives us something to look forward
>> to every December 25th. Considering the gifts bequeathed to us on April
>> 15th, it's a Christmas Miracle that Santa's still in business.
>>
>>
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